When bad beds happen to good people

**Seizure Warning**

I see all kinds of crap out in the wild. Purple walls, missing toilets, Pepto pink ceilings, all manner of wall art made from beer caps. Still, nothing prepared me for this:


Just in case you were dropped on your head and want to actually buy this thing, be warned that it is $3,000. (Proof) There is not a circumstance, ever, at any time, acceptable for this bed to be in anyone’s home. Even in the 70’s. It was designed by someone on acid and then another someone thought it should be produced and sold. And then the owner won’t be able to get it out of the house when they move, so they’ll leave it in the house I have to sell. See? Full circle.

There’s more to choose from. I kid you not.


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The only thing you can have in this bed is nightmares. At least it’s not in some super dark color in the back room of a super dark and smoky bar. It’s the softer side of ugly. Still ugly, though.

If you want more, there’s one left.

I have so many questions about this bed. If you think you just simply can’t go on until it’s yours, knock yourself out here. It’s $2100 and doesn’t come in black. Absolutely nothing good can happen in this bed. I’ve got a good imagination, and I stand by that statement.